The deleted sessions
The impact of reading the deleted sessions is unexpected.I began them to find more on art, initially they seemed filled with matters of Jane’s aliments and Robs blockages and misconceptions around creativity. In many ways they are. They also address the totality of life as practise; not the separate CC parts ‘and then life’. It brought to mind the analogous sunday Christian, Bdsm weekend warrior or painter hobbyist. By affirming when I began that CC practise and art practise was one an integration of sorts had begun.
The deleted sessions unceremoniously drag in the fleshiness of biology and the inconveniences of biography as practise determinants.
The unknown realities though here and now, and CC possibilities also here and now, are not there, just for the taking/having as an act of will.
I-Create-My-Own-Reality has been a conundrum. A more apt correct question I see is not ‘what does this mean’ or ‘even which self does the creating’but what is involved?
-What does it mean? though a necessary intellectual space to be in , I stayed there longer than strictly useful because I did not know what question to ask next.
-Which self does the creating? was also a useful question because within theI-I-I model, creative volitional capabilities are ascribed to a certain place of self. This model was confusing and resolving it for myself has required much pondering.My resolution has to do with an integration of all three so called I’s into one I, the ‘continuous self ’.I am not done with that yet.
Thus I come to the main question- what is involved?
Jane and Rob asked a lot of themselves in bringing forth this material. They operated as a beautiful, dynamic ‘we’ each giving to and supporting each other and hindering each other. Both had baggage of former relationships and difficult upbringings to contend with.
Robs notes which I generally skip, I now see as almost another book through which I see the brilliance of their jointness
”…If you were just writer or just an artist, or if Rubert were just a writer or just a psychic, then neither of you would be involved in this endeavour, which is even in your terms, of such a creative endeavour that it defies definition. It does not rest in either of you alone, but rises from joint psychological structures that you have formed together, each using what characteristics you could-psychological structures that you use to gain a viewpoint upon reality that is so unique…” Deleted sessions Vol 5 page 115
( I have never warmed to the idea of collaborative projects with other artist in art making, but I change)
The practical implications of everyday ’things’, a loose tooth, unexpected unwelcome visitors, concerns surrounding finances, a dysfunctional sex life, resentments of success and fears of disapprovals from the beloved.The messiness of life, which I would push aside to get on with …'practise' of a less cluttered nature. For J&R practise did not take place in a hermetically sealed monastery, or a secluded place on mountain, nor did it discount life lived that far and including that moment. Practise was the life lived..
This enables me to see that I am in the painting and artwork even as I make other art works. The disentanglement from camouflage is not just about seeing the unknown realities behind physical reality but also seeing the unknown reality of myself behind biography, but that is only possible by first engaging with biography.
The deleted sessions unceremoniously drag in the fleshiness of biology and the inconveniences of biography as practise determinants.
The unknown realities though here and now, and CC possibilities also here and now, are not there, just for the taking/having as an act of will.
I-Create-My-Own-Reality has been a conundrum. A more apt correct question I see is not ‘what does this mean’ or ‘even which self does the creating’but what is involved?
-What does it mean? though a necessary intellectual space to be in , I stayed there longer than strictly useful because I did not know what question to ask next.
-Which self does the creating? was also a useful question because within theI-I-I model, creative volitional capabilities are ascribed to a certain place of self. This model was confusing and resolving it for myself has required much pondering.My resolution has to do with an integration of all three so called I’s into one I, the ‘continuous self ’.I am not done with that yet.
Thus I come to the main question- what is involved?
Jane and Rob asked a lot of themselves in bringing forth this material. They operated as a beautiful, dynamic ‘we’ each giving to and supporting each other and hindering each other. Both had baggage of former relationships and difficult upbringings to contend with.
Robs notes which I generally skip, I now see as almost another book through which I see the brilliance of their jointness
”…If you were just writer or just an artist, or if Rubert were just a writer or just a psychic, then neither of you would be involved in this endeavour, which is even in your terms, of such a creative endeavour that it defies definition. It does not rest in either of you alone, but rises from joint psychological structures that you have formed together, each using what characteristics you could-psychological structures that you use to gain a viewpoint upon reality that is so unique…” Deleted sessions Vol 5 page 115
( I have never warmed to the idea of collaborative projects with other artist in art making, but I change)
The practical implications of everyday ’things’, a loose tooth, unexpected unwelcome visitors, concerns surrounding finances, a dysfunctional sex life, resentments of success and fears of disapprovals from the beloved.The messiness of life, which I would push aside to get on with …'practise' of a less cluttered nature. For J&R practise did not take place in a hermetically sealed monastery, or a secluded place on mountain, nor did it discount life lived that far and including that moment. Practise was the life lived..
This enables me to see that I am in the painting and artwork even as I make other art works. The disentanglement from camouflage is not just about seeing the unknown realities behind physical reality but also seeing the unknown reality of myself behind biography, but that is only possible by first engaging with biography.
posted by Belle at 8:33 AM
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